The reason why…

(thoughts, written on Tuesday 23 March 2010)

When you run, are you running to something? Or running away from something?


I do not run to or from anything. I just am.  I am in the moment.  I run.

I breathe.  I focus.  I can’t wear an iPod.

I don’t run on a treadmill.

I am outside.  I breathe.  I think.

How are my feet?  How do I feel?

Relaxed shoulders.  90 degree elbows.  Push from the toes.

I make minute adjustments.  I gauge my body’s reactions.

I listen.  To myself.


When you swim, what do you think about?


I focus.  Each little technique.  Each little movement.  Each position.

I feel the water.

Catch earlier. Hug the water. Continuous motion. Smooth wrists.

Glide. Extend like superman. Feel the water. In my hands, on my palms, all the way past my legs.

I am lost. I am not here or there. I am not coming or going. I am.

I could be six. Or sixteen. Or thirty nine. It doesn’t matter. It has no time. No grounding in reality.

The only thing that matters is that particular moment.

I am in that moment. I am lost. I am here.


I emerge.

I walk home. There is light rain. A mist. On my face, in my hair. Surrounding me.

It covers me. It lets me hold onto that moment. That lost but present moment.

I focus on the mist. I block the sirens. I block the cars. I try to capture that… feeling.

Elusive peace. Absolute focus.


The search for perfection. Little adjustments. Listening. Hidden signals.  Feeling the smallest of things.

The reason why…

3 responses to “The reason why…”

  1. Ilyse, your question was what started me writing this post.  I had it on my mind.  And when I got out of the pool on Tuesday I felt completely lost and in the moment at the same time.  Maybe in a few weeks after a lot of road cycling I’ll be able to write about what I think about when cycling…  Stay tuned!  x Donna

  2. exactly and well put!  glad you are doing so well on your training!  just got back from hawaii.  did my very 1st mile swim race in maui which was great even with a sea turtle distraction.  did a tri relay with my brother and husb michael which was inspiring.  going to write a race report and i’ll send to you.  so happy your run training sounds like it’s going really well.  love your updates.  take care!  xo e

  3. Donna, I love this.  Why do I run?  What do I think about?  Where am I going?  I don’t have these thoughts.I just do.  I tend to sort out unfinished business on my runs, but mostly…I just try to be in the moment…sometimes, it’s hard!Great blog!~MsV1959

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