(thoughts, written on Tuesday 23 March 2010)
When you run, are you running to something? Or running away from something?
I do not run to or from anything. I just am. I am in the moment. I run.
I breathe. I focus. I can’t wear an iPod.
I don’t run on a treadmill.
I am outside. I breathe. I think.
How are my feet? How do I feel?
Relaxed shoulders. 90 degree elbows. Push from the toes.
I make minute adjustments. I gauge my body’s reactions.
I listen. To myself.
When you swim, what do you think about?
I focus. Each little technique. Each little movement. Each position.
I feel the water.
Catch earlier. Hug the water. Continuous motion. Smooth wrists.
Glide. Extend like superman. Feel the water. In my hands, on my palms, all the way past my legs.
I am lost. I am not here or there. I am not coming or going. I am.
I could be six. Or sixteen. Or thirty nine. It doesn’t matter. It has no time. No grounding in reality.
The only thing that matters is that particular moment.
I am in that moment. I am lost. I am here.
I walk home. There is light rain. A mist. On my face, in my hair. Surrounding me.
It covers me. It lets me hold onto that moment. That lost but present moment.
I focus on the mist. I block the sirens. I block the cars. I try to capture that… feeling.
Elusive peace. Absolute focus.
The search for perfection. Little adjustments. Listening. Hidden signals. Feeling the smallest of things.
The reason why…